[edit] HETFET - News Release


(May 6)

By Elizabeth Moora

For weeks, reports of a devil-like figure have been streaming in from across the world. It’s been seen skulking in alleys, leaping on rooftops, roaming through forests, and even (if the report from the small town of Milwaukee Oregon is to be believed) at a fast food drive thru. Some say he has horns and a tail, others claim he wears a trench coat. One fervent eye-witness even swears that he smells like chili. The identity of this crimson creature may be subject to debate, but one thing is clear: in countless cities and towns across several continents, there is someone who has seen what locals have dubbed “The Devil Man.”

“It’s kind of like we got our own Bigfoot thing going on here,” said one local who wished to remain anonymous. “Only he doesn’t have big feet and he’s not really hairy.”

Despite the fact that there is still no concrete evidence that this creature even exists, police departments across the globe are taking this rash of sightings very seriously. On Monday, Milwaukee Police Lieutenant Fillmore appointed a two-detective task force to investigate. “Sometimes the voice of the people speak louder than cold, hard facts.” said Fillmore, in defense of the appointment.

Whatever it is, Devil Man has attracted worldwide attention. Here at HETFET, we believe that the Devil Man is absolutely real, and could be a menace to trolls and other mystical creatures. We urge anyone who comes in contact with him to snap a picture, take video or even make a sketch, then send it in - together we can make a difference. A quick warning though, do not to interact with the creature, as it could be a danger to itself or others.